Changing minds is a deeply intricate process that involves multiple layers of personal reflection, ongoing exposure to diverse perspectives, and experiences that directly challenge our long-held beliefs. Encounters with viewpoints that differ from our own often prompt us to question the assumptions we have taken for granted, creating a mental space for re-evaluation and potential growth. This openness to new ideas and perspectives doesn’t happen in isolation—it is frequently fueled by empathy, curiosity, and a genuine willingness to understand others. Yet, changing one's mind is rarely an instantaneous shift. It usually requires time, multiple exposures to alternative viewpoints, and the internal motivation to pursue real transformation. Additionally, our mental and emotional readiness significantly impact our openness to change, as factors like our current mental state, personal relationships, and the surrounding environment all play crucial roles. In essence, changing one’s mind is a journey that highlights the adaptive and dynamic nature of human thought.
David McRaney, in “How Minds Change,” delves into the intricate mechanisms behind changing beliefs, opinions, and attitudes. Drawing from insights in psychology, neuroscience, and social science, McRaney examines how people shift their perspectives on beliefs that are deeply intertwined with their identity. His exploration reveals that changing one’s mind is not merely about adopting new ideas; it involves a fundamental transformation in how we perceive ourselves, our values, and our world.
Challenges to Changing One’s Mind
Cognitive Bias and Belief Systems
Our beliefs are resilient, often anchored by cognitive biases that reinforce existing perspectives. McRaney explains that confirmation bias, for instance, drives people to seek information that aligns with their beliefs, while dismissing or ignoring information that contradicts them. Because our beliefs are closely tied to personal identity, social relationships, and emotions, they resist change, especially when challenged by logic or facts alone. Adam Grant, in “Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don’t Know”, introduces “rethinking”—the practice of questioning and revising beliefs as a critical life skill. Grant emphasizes that rethinking is not about living in constant self-doubt; rather, it is about embracing uncertainty and intellectual humility to remain open to new information and insights.
The Illusion of Rational Decision-Making
Many of us believe that our decisions are rational, rooted in clear logic, but McRaney reveals that emotions and unconscious processes significantly shape our choices. He highlights the "illusion of explanatory depth," where people believe they understand complex issues better than they actually do, which can prevent them from seeking alternative perspectives. Behavioral economist Dan Ariely, uncovers how irrationality drives much of our decision-making, influenced by emotions, social norms, and comparisons. Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein, in “Nudge and Misbehaving”, examine how “nudges” subtly influence decision-making by leveraging biases like default choices and loss aversion. They argue that even small environmental adjustments can shape behavior without directly challenging beliefs, showing that we are often "predictably irrational."
Social Influence and Group Identity
Changing one’s mind is not simply an individual decision but is significantly influenced by social dynamics and the innate need to belong. McRaney notes that we are often more affected by the beliefs of those around us than by objective facts, as social groups provide emotional support, a sense of identity, and security. These social bonds reinforce group norms—shared beliefs, values, and behaviors that unify group members. Brené Brown, in “Braving the Wilderness and Dare to Lead”, discusses how the need for belonging and acceptance can lead people to adopt group beliefs over personal convictions. Brown suggests that true belonging requires balancing connection with authenticity, fostering resilience to social pressures while staying open to new perspectives.
Tools for Changing Minds
Changing Minds Through Persuasion
Effective persuasion is not achieved through confrontation; it relies on empathy and genuine listening. McRaney highlights that people tend to resist aggressive or confrontational approaches, often becoming more entrenched in their beliefs. Instead, listening creates a receptive environment where people feel understood, laying the groundwork for open-mindedness. Robert Cialdini, in “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion”, identifies six principles of persuasion—reciprocity, commitment, social proof, authority, liking, and scarcity. He argues that people are more willing to consider changing their minds when approached in ways that align with these principles. For example, social proof, which demonstrates that others hold a particular belief, can often be more persuasive than straightforward facts alone.
Motivational Interviewing: A Tool for Self-Reflection
Motivational Interviewing (MI) is a powerful technique that encourages people to reflect on their beliefs and any ambivalence they may feel, often leading them to naturally question and shift their perspectives. Rather than pushing a viewpoint, MI helps individuals uncover their personal motivations for change, drawing on intrinsic rather than extrinsic motivation. Research shows that MI’s emphasis on self-efficacy and intrinsic motivation fosters sustainable change. Its client-centered, empathetic approach establishes a supportive environment where self-reflection can lead to meaningful transformation.
Jonathan Passmore, a leading figure in coaching psychology, has applied MI extensively in coaching practices. He emphasizes that MI enhances coaching effectiveness by addressing clients' ambivalence and aligning their behaviors with personal values and goals. By focusing on clients’ motivations, MI creates a space for self-reflection that fosters authentic change.
Dan Siegel also sheds light on how personal narratives influence our beliefs. Siegel explains that the brain constructs stories to make sense of our experiences, and these narratives significantly shape our beliefs. Changing one’s mind often requires becoming aware of these stories and learning to reframe them. Siegel underscores that curiosity, openness, and sometimes guidance from others are essential in reshaping limiting beliefs, allowing us to explore new perspectives.
Practical Applications: Integrating Knowledge into Coaching
These insights offer valuable strategies for coaches aiming to foster open-mindedness and facilitate meaningful belief change in their clients.
Encourage Empathy and Perspective-Taking
Invite clients to choose a belief they hold strongly and write a few sentences or discuss with you the viewpoint of someone with an opposing perspective. Encourage them to explore the emotional and cognitive motivations behind this opposing viewpoint. This exercise helps clients recognize the complexity in differing perspectives, building empathy and openness to change. I have used this exercise to invite clients to share the narrative they are telling from the other’s perspective.
Identify Cognitive Biases
This exercise on cognitive bias is designed to help clients identify, understand, and work through biases that may influence their beliefs and decision-making. Our cognitive biases can limit perspective, while surfacing them can enable thinking more critically and approaching beliefs with greater awareness. Ask clients to analyze a recent decision or belief and identify cognitive biases that may have influenced it (e.g., confirmation bias, availability bias). Invite the client to explore what emotions surfaced when believing the bias. Questions such as “Is it true, is it really true, how do you feel when you think that way, and how would you feel if you didn’t think that way?” by becoming aware of these hidden influences, clients can think more critically, making them more receptive to alternative perspectives and fostering personal growth.
Build Self-Awareness to Reframe Limiting Beliefs
Encourage clients to reflect on situations where they felt resistant to others' ideas or ask them to consider why they felt this way and explore ways to reframe these reactions. For example, if they felt defensive, help them uncover why they are feeling resistance and then possibly view it as an opportunity for growth. This approach fosters flexibility, showing that they can reinterpret experiences in ways that support openness and adaptability.
Changing one’s mind involves much more than accepting new information; it’s a nuanced process that navigates cognitive biases, social dynamics, and personal identity. By integrating empathy, curiosity, and self-reflection into coaching practices, coaches can create environments that empower clients to explore and evolve their beliefs constructively. Through such practices, coaches guide clients on a journey toward greater openness, self-awareness, and growth, ultimately helping them align their beliefs with their core values and goals.
Global IOC is presenting a Webinar on Wednesday, December 4th at 11 am EST on this topic. The interactive presentation will include more exercises for leaders and coaches to use when helping clients explore perspectives, beliefs, and biases.